Irony and Sarcasm

Mother America

It became an issue in the poetry workshop with Sam Hamill that I attended whether America was a Fatherland or a Motherland.

Our Boys in Green

They're strict here.

The International Protestant Conspiracy

Will someone please tell the Bush Administration Jews to get on the schtick?

Chat Challenges

There are a couple of questions that I like to spring on folks in chat rooms when their eyes grow blurry and they say things like "Oh, the slaves were so well treated. So much better than the working people". Or "We need a free market, absolutely devoid of governmental inference.

Orange Alert

Is Bush so insecure about his popularity ratings that he's trying to upstage the news that on Thursday Christ was born in Bethlehem 2003 years ago?

A Coming War

Is it only a matter of time before we invade the Carlyle Group?

Libertines: We Do Good for Society

We don't promote greed. What we do is take the money where it cannot be used by pressure groups for their own narrow purposes and give it to people who we can trust.

Mute Troubadour on the American Dispensation

Maybe that's just a local thing.

Word of an Attack on America

Here in our nation at war, in this neighborhood only ten miles from the Pacific Ocean where the sampans and the dhows could land and end our freedom forever, sabotaging clouds bombarded us with spikes of rain.

Things were different in the 1950s

During the 1950s, high school seniors could watch stag films, get drunk, and dance with "pert" and "plucky" girls and not have a hard on!

I joined!

Void where prohibited (coming soon in the United States as soon as they repeal the First Amendment!)

A New Pledge by Ahnold
"If elected, I promise to go nowhere where I might meet a woman without Maria Shriver handcuffed to me. I...

What are We Going to DO about Illegal Citizens?

If those who live here without INS approval are "illegal aliens", then those who do not register for the draft are "illegal citizens".

Econo Eyes
Get these cool glasses and you, too, can see the total reality of the Economy!...

Conservative Affirmative Action?

I actually think this is a great idea because students instinctively hate professors regardless of the tradition.

Real Men Don't Use Tin Cans

I bet Denis Boyle has never eaten acorn gruel! That's a real food of the land.

Another Perversion of Founding Thoughts

It seems to me that the CC has hit on a way to bring moneychangers into the virtual temple.

Very Popular with Himself
The top spender in the recall so far is Arnold Schwartzenegger ($6,333,351). His largest contributor is himself at $4,050,000. To...

Hell, Give Me A Chance

First thing I will do is instruct the state attorney general to investigate Dick Cheney and Enron. Supoenas are being typed up even as I write this.

A Tip for My Inner Critics

I'm overdue for the silent treatment

It was in The New York Times....

It's got to be true, right?

Realization
There's no surer way to stop comments than to stand up for yourself and say "excuse me, but not on...

Working in Iraq

What's this? A THREE HOUR WORKDAY? And everything is paid for by the U.S. Government? Why, I think this is an idea whose time has come! Let's bring it to America! What's good enough for the Iraqis is good enough for me!

I didn't feel the earthquake?!
California geography seems to have changed since I went to sleep last night....

Whistle....

Saddam Hussein's Minister of Information declares war to be won.

Sermon on the March:
Beatitudes for the American "Christian"

For a contrary view on the meaning of Christianity, read Matthew 5: 3-11.

Does this prove I'm Psychic?

OK, the official pre-viewing spoilers on the second part of The Lord of the Rings is out here at Pax Nortona.

Next: Survivor, Silicon Valley

People may actually be getting bored with all these wilderness experiences.

For Kevin....

Kevin says that that mundane activities can be interesting.

Temptation

It was ever so tempting, while entering names and information from my Mythology and Folklore of Death site, to include a few contemporaries among the death gods and their henchmen.

Rule 17

Whoever posted the topic in Dalnet #politics the other day needed to apply Rule 17 from Strunk and White's The Elements of Style, which is "Omit needless words."

Send me to Iraq if You Dare

The deal is this: if I raise $5,000 by January 1, 2003, I will go to Iraq. Expect blogging like I did back in 1992 when I went to Croatia and Serbia. If I don't hit $5,000, I will keep the money for myself. If I raise $10,000, I'll invite Thymewise to accompany me. Fair deal?