California Dreamer

Saturday, July 13, 2002


In Memory of Joe
(1984-2002)

I will miss you old friend. I will miss your spirit that scared anyone who tried to ride you, and your soothing gate that quieted those fears. A magnificent creature you were, tall and strong and beautiful. You showed me what it was like to be free, and to trust in something that was bigger than myself. You allowed an inexperienced young woman to become a rider. I will never forget you.


Tuesday, July 09, 2002


A bell rang in my ear the first time I heard about this weblog circle and I wanted to be a part of it. Although, in the beginning I was not sure if I was being asked to join, or simply notified of its existence. No matter now, I’m here! I’ve only been chatting for just less than a year, and in that time I have met some pretty interesting people along with some pretty strange people. One down side to chatting, in my opinion, is that even if we find someone interesting on the other end of the line, more often than not, there is a limit to what we can know about them and their lives. There could be many reasons for this. Some people may want to keep their lives private for security. Others could simply have an agenda, or something to hide. My mother has the idea that everyone who chats is lying and trying to be someone or something that they are not. Unfortunately, sometimes that is true, although for the most part I have not had any problems with the people that I have talked with, except that the people I have grown to like have not been able to really know much about me. Fortunately for me, some of the people I have grown to like are involved in this group and may read this. On that note, I have decided to start out by writing a bit about my life. I’m only 24, so this shouldn’t take too long.
I was born in the water down in southeast Texas. Ok, so I was not literally born in the water. I only say this because my family was very involved in water skiing and I have no early childhood memories that do not include the river, our boat, tournaments, and our ski club. My father taught my sister and me how to ski by pulling us, on skis he built, behind the lawn mower in the backyard. At two years old I began to ski in the water. I look back on those memories and smile because that part of my life did not last long. When I was five my parents divorced and soon after there was not much time for hobbies or recreation. However, I did begin ballet dancing and that became a major part of my life. I danced approximately three nights a week in class, and also participated in seasonal programs and annual recitals for thirteen years. Eventually, as I got older, I burned out and decided to call it quits.
In high school I developed an interest in journalism and I wrote for a local newspaper as a correspondent for my school. After graduating in 1996 I started college and decided to pursue a degree in communications. During my first year of college I met my husband whose father is a pastor of a large inter-denominational church in southeast Texas of which I was involved in. We met when I began attending the church and were married in February 1998. Just before getting married my husband joined the United States Air Force, and one week after our wedding was shipped off to basic training. Three months later I found out that I was pregnant. This was not in the plan. Throughout my pregnancy I struggled with the idea of having a child at that time in my life, even though I thoroughly enjoyed being pregnant. On my due date, 4 March 1999, I gave birth to a perfect baby girl. After seeing my child for the first time it was as though my eyes were opened to something I could never have known before that moment. I was also pretty relieved that labor was over!
One aspect of giving birth that still stands out to me is the nurse that was assigned to me. This woman was an angel. There was something about her caring and encouraging nature that guided me through a natural labor as though I was running a race that I had been training for all of my life. Having her beside me not only made giving birth a little easier, but she inspired me to pursue a nursing career and make a difference in some other laboring mother’s life.
In the last three years I have devoted my life to raising my little girl. It has been a joy and a privilege that I thank God for every day. It has not come without a price though. Being a full time mother, coupled with multiple military assignments throughout the country has not left me much time or energy to think about myself. I have taken some night classes along the way, getting myself back into school. I am still trying to figure out how I will juggle a full time nursing program, a three year old, a husband, the military, and relocations. There are so many people in the world who succeed in spite of the odds that are against them. My heart is set on becoming a nurse, even if it takes me a lifetime.
At the present time I am living in northern California with my daughter and my husband. I love Jesus, I love my family, and I love where I am at right now in my life. I look forward to writing more about experiences, chatting, family, and whatever else comes to mind. I hope that whoever reads my logs will learn a little about me and maybe even get a little glimpse inside themselves in whatever I write.


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